Coffee shop boy - Dear December (day 7)

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Dear Coffee shop boy,

I fear writing this will only make things worse. There are so many things I wish to find out about you, but I am simply too scared. Taking a chance is something that is encouraged, however something about you puts fear into myself. I think what this is that I am simply too scared to take a chance, for fear of messing things up. Part of me wants to learn about you.. How you talk, eat, laugh, smile. Part of me wants to run, far away until you cannot harm me. It's not your fault coffee shop boy. Maybe one day I will take a chance... Maybe one day you will take a chance on me.

Love... The girl in the booth at the back.


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Dear Coffee shop boy,

You told me once that you never wanted to hurt me. I replied with 'I know you won't.' Something about me 3 months ago is so naiive. You were so distant... yet so close to me. Everytime I hear Ed Sheerans voice... or the song I associated with you so much.. part of me breaks inside. Everytime I catch myself staring at couples holding hands I remember every time your hand brushed mine, and every whisper you placed on my heart. Something about it at the time was so bittersweet. Being with you was like walking on a tightrope. All I had to do was put one foot in front of the other. It seems so simple doesn't it. However what about walking on a tightrope with a million voices telling you that you are going to fall. Taunting you until you stop believing in yourself. That's what those 3 months felt like. The first time we were introduced and my favourite song was playing. The moment I will remember for life. Now that song is full of double-checking & self doubt. Similar to those 3 months. Remember that time you told me you would never hurt me? Three months on and already the promise is broken. Just like I am.

Love... The girl that never visits there anymore, for fear of remembering.




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Something different today.

Go out and change the world.

Love Char xo